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1、第八節(jié)亮點句式潤色的七大原則 技法指導 作文要想得高分，必須要有吸引閱卷老師眼球的亮點。如何打造亮點句式呢？大家可以遵循以下七個原則。 原則一：新穎性 改掉句中的俗詞，或合理調(diào)整句子語序，都有助于提升句子的新穎性。新穎的句子能為評卷者在評卷過程中帶來良性體驗，能有效提升作文表達和分值。 1變換用詞 行文時，既要避免使用俗詞，又要避開冷僻詞匯。 (1)Though it might be difficult，you will find a way of doing it at last and youll achieve success. However difficult it might b
2、e，you will find a way of doing it at last and youll achieve success.(2014山東高考滿分作文) 無論有多困難，你最終會找到一種干它的方法并取得成功。 (2)I believe very much that a wise choice leads to perfection. I am pretty convinced that a wise choice leads to perfection.(2013上海高考滿分作文) 我非常相信，英明的選擇會通向完美。 2變換語序 適當變換語序也有助于提高句子新穎性。在評卷過程中，倒裝
3、句、插入語等非正常語序形式都能讓評卷人眼前一亮。 (1)I was so excited that I couldnt wait to try my hand at riding it. So excited was I that I couldnt wait to try my hand at riding it.(2014福建高考滿分作文) 我那么激動以致于我迫不及待的嘗試騎它。 (2)I guess you must have had no end of trouble. You must have had no end of trouble，I guess. 我想你一定經(jīng)歷過無數(shù)的困難
4、。 學以致用 用變換用詞或語序的方式增加新穎性 1We should remember that hard work leads to success. We should bear in mind that hard work leads to success. 2Recycled bags are better than plastic bags in environment protecting. Recycled bags are superior to/have advantages over plastic bags in environment protecting. 3The
5、days when we Chinese people were looked down upon are gone. Gone are the days when we Chinese people were looked down upon. 4A beautiful smile can not only make ourselves happy，but also enable others to be delighted. Not only can a beautiful smile make ourselves happy，but also enable others to be de
6、lighted. 原則二：具體性 在具備一定詞匯量的條件下，具體的表達比泛泛而談的內(nèi)容更能引起讀者的共鳴。換句話說，寫作需要“真善美”，盡量避免“假大空”。 1My friend is fixing the car. My friend，Leon，is fixing his 12yearold Santana. 2I saw my classmate studying in the classroom. I saw my naughty but lovely classmate studying in the classroom. 學以致用 用“具體性原則”把“假大空版”改為“真善美版” 寫作
7、要求：學校要舉行一場題為“Turning a bad mood into a good one”的英語作文比賽，要求你寫一篇文章，其中一個要點是如何調(diào)整心情。 假大空版：Keeping a good mood is of great importance. When you feel angry or anxious，calm down. It is useless losing a temper and we should always make ourselves happy. 真善美版：We should learn to keep a good mood. Communicating
8、with family members or friends is the best choice. Also listening to some peaceful music can be helpful. Reading is another way to stop being mad. 原則三：簡潔性 寫作過程中，不必為了增添字數(shù)而采用冗余表達。給評分者帶來好感的不是字數(shù)，而是簡潔明了、條理清晰的語句。 1His brother，who is a tourist guide，will help us plan this trip. His brother，a tourist guide，
9、will help us plan this trip. 2They found the answer to be quite satisfactory. They found the answer quite satisfactory. 學以致用 用“簡潔性原則”簡化下面的句子 1The friendship that is based on profits wont last long. The friendship based on profits wont last long. 2They consider Paris to be the brain and heart of the
10、country. They consider Paris the brain and heart of the country. 原則四：緊湊性 作文中難免用到短句，但如果短句太多，會使人感到段落過于零散。因此需要將過多的短句整合成緊湊的句子。 Most tourist attractions in China are littered. This lake is the worst. Most tourist attractions in China are littered，the worst of which is this lake. Most tourist attractions
11、in China are littered，with this lake being the worst. 學以致用 用“緊湊性原則”整合下面的句子 1He is our English teacher. His name is Wang Bin. He has taught us for two years. Wang Bin，our English teacher，has taught us for two years. 2They finished repairing the broken chair together. They felt very happy. How happy t
12、hey felt after they finished repairing the broken chair together! 原則五：邏輯性 漢語重語義，英語重邏輯。在寫作中如果通過邏輯表達自己的觀點、取舍、好惡等信息，這樣的句子會博得評卷者的青睞。 1To put this problem to an end，we must follow these steps. To put this problem to an end，we have no alternative but to follow these steps. 2The love of a man who lays down
13、 his life for his friends is the greatest love. There is no greater love than that of a man who lays down his life for his friends. 學以致用 用“邏輯性原則”改寫下面的句子 1Mr. Stevenson is great to work forhe is really the best boss for me to ask for. Mr. Stevenson is great to work forI really couldnt ask for a bette
14、r boss. 2Being addicted to computer games can most affect the study of a student. Nothing can affect the study of a student as greatly as being addicted to computer games. 原則六：互動性 寫作是與讀者互動的一個過程。在寫作中，作者可以通過適當發(fā)問來引導讀者對論題逐漸深入了解。 Which is more important，wealth or health? 財富和健康，哪個更重要？ Which is better，a te
15、lephone call or a letter? 打電話還是寫信，哪個更好？ Should students make friends on line? 學生應該網(wǎng)上交友嗎？ 學以致用 用“互動性原則”改寫下列句子 1We should take the following measures to solve the problem. Any solutions？How about taking the following measures? 2As to whether the private car drivers shall be charged congestion fees，opi
16、nions are divided. Shall the private car drivers be charged congestion fees？Opinions are divided on this matter. 原則七：優(yōu)雅性 運用簡單的修辭，可增加句子的優(yōu)雅性。有些同學可能會感覺太難，但簡單易行的修辭方法我們在閱讀過程中隨處可見，只是我們只顧做題，從未領會過文章中的生花妙筆。 In order to get her to recover as soon as possible，I took good care of her by helping her take some me
17、dicine，putting cold towel on her forehead，preparing her meals，etc.(2013北京高考滿分作文) 為了讓她盡快恢復，我細心照顧她，幫她服藥、把冷毛巾放在她的額頭上、為她做飯等。(排比) One who teaches morality but practices immorality is a wolf in a sheeps skin. 滿口仁義道德，一肚子男盜女娼的人就是披著羊皮的狼。(比喻) 學以致用 用“優(yōu)雅性原則”翻譯下列句子 1要求這位秘書寫報告時要快速、準確、全面。(排比) The secretary was ask
18、ed to write the report quickly，accurately and throughly. 2老師說他是個差生，因為他要等到考試時才學習、做作業(yè)漫不經(jīng)心、而且缺乏學習動力。(排比) The teacher said that he was a poor student because he waited until the last minute to study for the exam，completed his homework in a careless way，and lacked motivation. 3世界就是個舞臺，所有的男人和女人都是演員。(比喻) The whole world is a stage. All men and women are merely players. 4自我批評的重要性就如同空氣和水一樣。(比喻) Selfcriticism is as important to us as air and water.
高考英語一輪復習 第三部分 寫作提升系列 第一板塊 第8節(jié) 亮點句式潤色的七大原則課件 北師大版
